Is how I feel
Yet I need so many.
I am left to wonder if they know
Of how much I need them
To live
To breathe
To be happy.
I wonder what it’s like
To be needed
Essential for survival.
I imagine it to be empowering
And reassuring,
For I feel fragile, weak and alone.
My heart is jealous
Of the comforts it does not have.
Comforts it sees in others
But not in itself.
I feel invisible and overlooked
Powerless to change that fact.
So indebted I am,
I refuse those whom I once needed
For I cannot bear to owe them
Anymore than I can give in return.
Such cruel irony it is
To need so much
And yet to give back so little.
Is it wrong
To want to be needed?